Primary foods are not the foods we eat; they are our "circle of life" so to speak. They are what makes us who we are and who we want to become. There are four main categories of primary foods: healthy relationships, regular physical activity, a desired career and a spiritual practice. When we use secondary foods, or the foods we actually eat, as a substitute for what is lacking with our primary foods, that's when we gain weight and have an unhealthy relationship with food. We have to ask ourselves, "what is out of balance with our primary foods?" There lies the answer.
Healthy relationships are the relationships we have with our partner, spouse, children, parents, friends, co-workers, etc. These relationships play an important role in our well-being. If we are unhappy on the home front, it actually will make us feel physically sick. It raises cortisol in our body which causes inflammation and inflammation causes diseases. Disagreements happen even in the best relationships because we all have our own ideas and thoughts and we don't always agree with someone. But, we have to pick our battles carefully because some of the little things we argue about don't really matter in the big picture. And as Dr. Wayne Dyer says, "would you rather be right or be at peace?" Being peaceful helps your mind and body to be calm and this keeps you healthy. Unhealthy relationships, especially with your partner or spouse, causes us to look for comfort in food. Not only does it cause weight gain, it causes depression, anxiety, sadness, frustration, anger and isolation. This cycle continues until we can figure out how to work through our tattered relationships, so until then, we look for comfort in food.
We have a lot of relationships during our lifetime, and the quality of these relationships tells alot about the quality of a person's life and their health. As one diet is not right for everyone, the way we relate to others is not the same for each relationship. What's really important is to be involved in healthy relationships that support your individual needs. If you feel that certain relationships are not working and you know that they are making you sick, you have to make a change even if it's painful. People come into our lives, sometimes for just a short period of time. We need to know when to let go.
Career is something we all have, whether it's working in a bank, a school, an office or a house; we need to work to make money...bottom line. We spend 8 - 10 hours between driving and working at least 5 days a week. We spend more time at work than we do at home and more time with our co-workers than our family! Work is a big part of our lives and yet there are lot of people who are not happy with their job. Being in a job where we are not happy is pure torture. I know first hand about being unhappy and unappreciated at work. Ten years ago, I would dread getting up in the morning knowing I would have to face that person/situation at work. Until I started getting sick, breaking out in hives and being anxious, I finally made the decision to go full force into finding a new job that I really enjoyed. When I found a much better position, I was miraculously better! The hives went away along with the anxiety. I felt happier to get up and ready for work each day. I was finally appreciated and able to use my creative side with many work projects, and my new boss respected me for all my hard work and I felt what I was doing was meaningful to me. Finding meaning in our work is a huge plus in being satisfied with our job. If you can't find meaning in your job, how about joining a group or finding a hobby where you can use your creative side or an interest you may have. Again, everyone is different, so there is no right job for everyone or a rule book on how you can find happiness in your job. Only you can figure out what works best for you. We really need to nourish ourselves by finding work that we love and getting fair compensation for it!
Spirituality feeds us on a very deep level. We are all searching for the meaning of life and why are we here? We look for meaning in how many "things" we acquire, that special promotion or "title" at work, or how beautiful or handsome we are. These are just fleeting snapshots of life. what are we really craving? What are we searching for?
We sometimes confuse spirituality with religion, they are not the same. I believe that knowing "God" or the "Universe" is spiritual, going to church and being in an organization following rules is a religion. All of "God" energy is in every living thing on this planet and in the universe. As in most forms of spiritual practice, the more we concentrate on being "one" with our "higher power," the more we are connected to everything and everyone around us, and the more we will be at peace. When we feel separated from each other, is when we feel alone and feel no one understands what we are going through.
One way to become more connected to your higher power is to be grateful every day. Be thankful for getting up in the morning, be thankful you have a nice bed and warm home and good food. I write in a journal every night 3 things I was thankful for today. You will see how your awareness grows to all things you are grateful for in your life! Life is too short, let's try to enjoy and be grateful each and every day!